Arrival of the Book

When I got home today the answering machine was blinking.  I pushed the button and listened to the message.  It was from Nurse Marlene.  I couldn't dial her number quick enough.  We spoke for a few minutes and made arrangements for her to drop off the book at my house.  It was great to see her.  We had a wonderful conversation.  She so graciously listened to the stories of mine and Dana's signs from heaven as well as our trials and tribulations .  We try to be strong and most of the time we are.  Shortly after Ryan passed Nurse Cathy shared with me that she always tries to better over bitter whenever possible.  Nurse Cathy lost her son in a car accident and her husband to cancer.  I have tried to follow her words and so far it has worked.  I realize I do have a choice, I can sit around and have a pity party or I can make a difference.  I choose to make a difference.  The best part of it is, although Ryan is no longer on Earth he continues to make a difference as well.  Here is his story that was published in the book Caring.  This book was given to all nurses that work for Kaiser(Southern Calif.) in honor of Nurses Appreciation Week.  I couldn't read it while Nurse Marlene was here but as soon as she left I curled up on the couch with a box of tissue.  I could barely read it through the tears streaming down my face.  After I got through it the first time I dried my tears and read it again and again and again.  I'm so proud of my baby boy.  

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