Happy Birthday Ryan!

I can't believe my sweet baby boy turned 3 years old yesterday.  Where does the time go?  I guess he really isn't a baby anymore.  I only knew him as a baby so in my eyes and mind I suppose he will always be a baby.  It's hard to imagine what it would be like with a three year old running around the house.  Dana and I often wonder what Ryan would be interested in.  Would it be trucks and trains or perhaps pirates and games, who knows?  Sometimes I wonder if he would even love lions as much as we do!  Whatever his interest maybe I know he had a great birthday in heaven surrounded by loving family.  I'm sure our heavenly father had a beautiful day planned for him that included Angels food cake for dessert.  

Image borrowed from cafepress.com 

Happy Birthday Ryan!
You are forever in our hearts.

Happy Birthday Ryan

On June 1st Ryan turned two. People call it the terrible two's but the only thing terrible I can think of is that he is not here to celebrate it with us. Words cannot express how much I miss my son. In memory of Ryan, Dana and I visited the cemetery. We bought a toy truck for Ryan and his friend Jose who shares the same birthday. We placed flowers in the shape of a lion's head along with a stuffed lion. Family and friends also left Ryan a stuffed dog that looks like our chocolate lab, a race car, balloons, and an army man. It touches our hearts to know that he is not forgotten. We love you baby boy. You are forever in our hearts!

Happy Birthday to Me!

Well, I must say I handled my birthday much better this year than last. Last year's birthday was not welcomed at all. I had a complete melt down and could barely pull myself together. You can read about it here. This year I wanted to celebrate my birthday by watching the Sugar Shane Mosely vs. Floyd Money Mayweather fight. Dana didn't want to purchase it because it's so expensive and you can watch it for free the following week. I begged and pleaded and finally won him over. At the last minute we invited a few friends over for pizza and to watch the fight. We were all cheering for Sugar Shane. We had a glimpse of hope in round 2 but after that it was all over.

Happy Birthday Mom!

Back in February, yes I know it was a long time ago, we celebrated my Mom's birthday. We ate a delicious dinner at my Grandmother's house. Its been so long I can't remember what we ate but I know it was good because dinner at Grandma's is always good. My Mom's birthday cake was a family favorite, chocolate caramel ice cream cake. Yum, Yum. Happy Birthday Mom, sorry this post is so late.

This is my Mom trying to keep my nephew from blowing out her candles before she does.

Happy Birthday Dana!

This past Saturday my wonderful husband celebrated his 41st birthday. He is smart, handsome, funny (sometimes, he thinks he's hilarious), and has a very quick wit. I am so lucky and blessed to be married to him. Although, he does drive me crazy when he can't find his shoes, keys, and anything else that isn't attached permanently to his body, he remains the love of my life. I am always quick to remind him that he is the best husband I've ever had.

Earlier this week Dana and I had a discussion about what he wanted to do for his birthday. He was tossing around the idea of going to dinner with his family and that was it. A couple of days later I asked him if he made a decision. He told me that he didn't want to spend any money and besides I threw him a big party last year (I hadn't started a blog yet so there isn't a post). Last year, I surprised Dana with a party at Dave and Busters. So back to this year, I suggested a bowling party. Fairly inexpensive, everyone can mingle, eat some pizza and cake, and have a good time. Noooo, my idea was shot down right away. Oh well I tried.

Now it's Thursday night, Dana is getting ready to leave for his hockey game. I remind him to call his family and tell them he doesn't want to do anything. He says he will, kisses me goodbye, and walks out the door. I thought wow, I'm getting off so easy. It's now sometime after 11:00 p.m.. I woke up from the couch with the dog barking excitedly because her daddy was home. Dana enters the house and informs me that we are now having dinner with his family at The Old Spaghetti Factory on Friday night at 7:00 p.m. and oh that's not all! We will be having Pizza and a bowling party with his hockey buddies on Saturday night. I guess there's nothing like planning your own birthday parties.

We had a fabulous time. Thank you everyone for celebrating with us and making Dana's birthday weekend so special. Happy 41st Birthday Dana, I Love You!

My Nephew's 7th Birthday

On Saturday we celebrated my Nephew Derek's birthday. Everyone had a great time including the adults.

Happy Birthday Ryan

Ryan the lion flowers

Ryan we are so blessed to have you in our lives.  We hope you had the best birthday in heaven.  We were thinking of you all day.  In your memory we did many acts of kindness, I'm sure you were watching from up above.  We love and miss you.  You are forever in our hearts.  

To start my day I woke up early and made Dana's lunch.  I told Dana that was my first act of kindness.  For my next act of kindness, I stopped by the local Starbucks and put money on a gift card.  I asked the cashier to use the gift card to pay for people's orders.  Then I went to the cemetery and placed a cute little dog and balloon for Jose who is Ryan's neighbor.  They share the same birthday. 

The little blue dog I gave to Ryan's friend

 After that I came home and baked cupcakes to share with all my neighbors.  I put them in a box decorated with ribbon and a card that read: This act of kindness was done in loving memory of Ryan J. Peterson on his first birthday.  Yes, Dana even helped me with the boxes and cupcakes.  Earlier, the neighbors brought over a small cake with one candle.  

This is the cake Dana and I shared

When Dana got home from work we took the cake over to the cemetery.  We lit the candle, sang happy birthday, and made a wish.  Then we sat there enjoying every bite of Ryan's cake.  I thought I would be sobbing but I actually felt good and happy that we did it.  I never thought we would be singing happy birthday at the cemetery but this is our life.  Even though today was very emotional it wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be.  I was glad I was home to cry when I wanted to cry and not have to explain my tears to anyone.  The worst was leading up to today.  Last night I couldn't help but replaying everything in my mind leading up to his birth.  When he was born there was hope that he would make it.  Now it's harder to deal with because I know exactly what's going to happen in sixteen days.  Now I truly understand why our lives are better left to chance.  

I can't thank everyone enough for participating in Ryan's birthday celebration.  Your thoughts and kind words have made this day pass gently and with great memories.  Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

I forgot to mention Dana's act of kindness.  He paid for his buddy, who lost his job, to go golfing.  They had a great time and even encountered a coyote on the golf course.

Lisa     

For All of Us Who Wonder What a Birthday is Like in Heaven

A Birthday In Heaven
© 2005 Written by Kris Smith

I heard you crying yesterday
And felt your heart-sent love
So I’m sending you this message
Now, from Heaven up above.

You’re wondering if I’ll celebrate
My birthday (way up here)
I know you’re missing me today
I feel your essence near.

God planned a special day for me
He told me with a wink
He’d ordered me a special cake
(It’s Angel food, I think)

I’m getting lots of hugs from God
He’s really good at that
And every time that I walk by
He gives my head a pat

Balloons will fill the streets for me
They float up through the clouds
And we have lots of clowns up here
That make us laugh out loud

There is a birthday carousel
Jeweled horses ride the wind
With music playing oh so sweet…
The magic never ends

I’ve made so many friends, you see
We laugh and play and sing
We ride our bikes and play jump rope
And sleep in Angel’s wings

We’ll have our cake and ice cream
And open gifts, surprise!
But we don’t blow out our candles here
Instead, they light the skies

I found this lovely poem on a website and wanted to share it with everyone.  It was written for a beautiful girl, Alexis Nicole who was gone too soon.  You can view her website at www.mcadangel.com.  Thank you, Kristal for giving me permission to use your poem. 

Ryan's Birthday Invitation

You are invited to participate in a special birthday celebration

We hope this party will bring you inspiration

No candle, no cake, no balloons to decorate

You ask, what kind of party can this be?

Keep reading and you will see

On June 1st be as bold as a king and as brave as our lion

Please perform one act of kindness in memory of Ryan!

We hope you understand that your present will be

to fill someone's heart with glee.

We are anxious to see what your act of kindness will be.  

Please leave your comment briefly describing your act of kindness here

Happy Birthday

Well today is my 36th birthday.  I've been absolutely dreading it.  In my mind it only means the gap is closing for Dana and I to try to have another baby.  My mom called me at 6:30 this morning.  I was able to keep it together until I hung up.  After the call I had a complete melt down.  Not only does it mean our window of opportunity is closing but Ryan's birthday is only a month away.  I can't believe it, I just can't believe it.  Some how I was able to get myself together and make it to work.  The best part of the day was the present from Dana.  Before I left in the morning he told me to look at my wrist.  The first thought that popped into my mind was that he wrote on me.  I started looking at my wrist and discovered he added a charm to my bracelet.  Now I have a picture of Ryan's lion.  On the back he had engraved Ryan the Lion.  It made me so happy.  He was so sneaky about it.  Dana even called one of my friends to get her help.  Every time I look at it a tearful smile appears.  That night we went out to dinner at Kings Fish House.  It was good but it didn't leave us wanting to hurry back.  We almost didn't make it to dinner because I couldn't get the waterworks to stop.  Once again I pulled it together.  It really wears me out to be on this emotional roller coaster.  Well it's over and hopefully I can get on with trying again without worrying about my age.

Lisa